— like a glimpse in a storefront window as I hurry by on my way to the post office. Or the Co-op.
You know when you’re not expecting to see yourself and suddenly you do, devoid of the pre-supposed image you carry around in your mind, the one in which you still appear as you did five, 10 years ago although perhaps with a slightly updated hairstyle? The sight startles: Oh, shit, is that ME? That non-young person with the worried forehead? Walking with invisible burdens evident in every step?
I cringe – but such clarity, harsh as it may be, would help me if I could apply it to my mind, to my thoughts. If only I could determine why exactly I take on things, the reasons beneath the reasons, so I would know if my decisions were smart ones, as carefully made as I imagine they might be.
Point being, I am enjoying this KSLG shift. I am also slightly dizzy from the addition of 30 hours of commitment and wondering where the line between selfless and selfish lies.